What's love got to do with it?

Good friends are rare.
Significant relationships are to be treasured.
Pure human connections are selfless, and do not come with expectation of reciprocation.
They appreciate strengths and understand weakness.
Friendship knows the steps of a dance called communication and executes that dance with eloquence.
The interpersonal experience of comradery must clothe itself in honest that is unadulterated by selective truth or minimized deception.
Apologies and forgiveness are natural and without strain.
A true friend will aide in realization and proactivity of goals, dreams, and vision.
Iron must sharpen iron; faith must build faith, and the removal of stumbling blocks is essential.
Call one another higher to fulfill the purpose of God in each others life.
In this you will find more than a good friend, but rather family.

Greater love hath no man than this that a man lay down his life for another; there is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.
It’s been said Jesus is that brotherly friend who lay down is life in death for us. Is it possible that “laying down your life” means more than just dying? Could “life” mean goals, ambitions, dreams, etc.? The disciples laid down their lives for Christ. Sometimes we need to lay down what we want for others. We are called to be family as “brothers and sisters in Christ”. Maybe it could be said like this, “A friend who displays fraternal love is willing to set aside his desires for the good of his brother.”

Abandon (Relation) Ship

…or you might end up relation ship-wrecked.

Singles-Definition;
A. Green pieces of paper not in my wallet;
B. Orange pieces of cheese not in my fridge;
C. Yellow species of student not in a relationship;

It seems that dating is a large part of campus life, especially on Christian campuses. The “Ring by spring or your money back” philosophy is a problematic mindset that plagues the student body often distracting them from responsibility and rational thought. Some students even feel pressure from their peers to be in a relationship for fear of being shamed a loser. Even the openly single get sucked in and go on ambiguous “non-dates” with various members of the opposite sex. The trivialization of these matters must stop. It is potentially detrimental to the moral integrity of the students and threats itself as a danger to the emotional well being of young men and women. Simply stated, casual dating is wrong!

The dangerous nature of casual dating hides behind masks of innocence and intention. It justifies itself in a series of “justs” that can spiral straight down to unjust immorality. Just flirting becomes just hand holding, which turns into just kissing and just making out, throw in some petting and just a little fellatio and you might end up with “just a little” junior. Granted this is the worse case scenario, but that doesn’t make it an improbability.

So what’s wrong with the fugacious nature of casual dating? What is the big deal? Let’s say sexual purity is maintained and no one’s moral standards are compromised; what possible harm could there be? According to Stephen Covey (7 Habits) every relationship has what Covey calls and “emotional bank account”. Whether family, friend, or other emotional deposits and withdrawals are made in each of these relationships. Casual dating is like making numerous withdrawals from an account that isn’t really yours. Ironically these withdrawals are often viewed as an investment. The more that is withdrawn in casual relationships the less there is to invest in legitimate ones. The confusion comes when young people mistake using each other for attention and affection, for relational investment.

Not only are these relationships emotionally draining they can also be very distracting, especially for those in an academic setting. It has been said that if time is money, and money is the root of all evil, and girls require both time and money, than girls are evil squared. A somewhat fallacious statement to say the least, but the idea is that relationships require a lot of work, time, and money. These are things students don’t usually have an abundance of. The college years especially are a time when a student should be able to focus on the task ahead without the distractions that are associated with opposite sex relations (within the contest of dating).




Casual dating is sort of like the food court in the mall, there are plenty of free samples to try as long as one moves from kiosk to kiosk. While these samples bring temporary fulfillment they ruin the untainted taste of the actual meal. Maybe it’s time to stop sampling and cleanse the pallet. Baby wieners on a stick only go so far after all. So what is the solution? To answer a question with a question; what is the purpose of dating? Some use dating to fill a shallow selfish desire for companionship, others jump into a relationship to “Steak the flag” i.e. get the guy or girl before someone else does. This comes from a lack of faith, patience, and perspective. Some practical steps can be taken to avoid some of the casual dating pitfalls. One of which is being intentional. A car shouldn’t be test driven unless the driver is interested in buying it. This is a caution especially for young men. Preparation is important; if marriage is any more than a year or so away from the realm of possibility why bother? Another very important factor in the whole process is that of authority. What do the authority figures in each person’s life have to say about the relationship? Parents, pastors, and other authority figures can often share an unskewed perspective that keeps each party’s best interest in mind.

Protection of the heart is the most important thing in all of this. No one wakes up and says, “Today I want to lead someone on” or “I really want to play with somebody’s emotions and break their heart”. This however is often the result of casual dating. Dating with purpose and intention is the only way to ensure the protection of the hearts of everyone involved.

Dashboard Conceptuals.

thoughts while driving...

In the last few years Christians have started embracing the idea of sonship in relation to God. "The Daddy Factor" has become a huge part modern theology. What I am wondering is what if we fully embraced what it meant to have GOD as our father?

What does it truly mean to be a Child of the Almighty Creator, heirs to the throne of heaven and earth. What kind of authority do we really have? How much of it do we excercise? Forget king of the world, I'm a prince of the universe. Child of God? What do you think?

j.

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